


So Hold Me Tight (Wolfstar)

by majesticdragonair



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Boggarts, Child Abuse, Established Relationship, Hogwarts Seventh Year, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-20
Updated: 2017-12-20
Packaged: 2019-02-17 12:50:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13077237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/majesticdragonair/pseuds/majesticdragonair
Summary: Sirius Black spent his entire time at Hogwarts hiding his home life from anyone who asked, and it all went down the drain because of a stupid fucking Boggart.





	So Hold Me Tight (Wolfstar)

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [It Means A Lot](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5826373) by [Woman_of_Letters](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Woman_of_Letters/pseuds/Woman_of_Letters). 



> i love writing about mental recovery for sirius, it's kinda unhealthy but oh well. 
> 
> title from hold me tight or don't by fall out boy

Boggarts. Sirius could feel himself tense up when Professor Dumbledore told them that’s what they would be studying today. His hands felt sweaty and he felt cold, his first thought the sight of his home, his brother scowling at him, his father sending cold looks and silent word, his-

“Sirius, come on!” he jumped out of his thoughts when James dragged him out of his seat, over to the line of people in front of a shaking closet. Remus sent him an odd look when Sirius didn’t say anything smart to James like he always would, but couldn’t say anything as Dumbledore begun explaining what to do. He watched as people went up to the Boggart and let it torment them with their fears.

(Sirius knew he was being overdramatic but he didn’t care at that point. He dreaded what his would turn into.)

Remus held his hand, behind him, as James stood up in front of the spider with no legs. The Boggart whirled and then Sirius was looking at himself and Lily Evans, dead with blood pouring out of them, but it was over in a flash and soon the two dead friends were up and jokingly hexing each other, the rest of the class laughing when Boggart-Lily turned the other companion’s black hair bright pink.

James flashed him a smile and stepped aside, and Sirius was forced to face the Boggart without holding his boyfriends. It whirled, and it felt like hours before he was staring back at Walburga Black, towering him with her sneering face, and her voice boomed loudly throughout the class, who’d gone quiet for once. Even Dumbledore had nothing to say, as if he knew it would happen (Sirius wouldn’t put it past him).

“You filthy, blood traitor!” She screamed, her voice loud. “You disgrace of a son, that’s what you are! A waste of space in this family, worthless and pathetic! You shouldn’t be standing where you are!”

She’s right. She always is. He doesn’t deserve to be where he is, to have James and Peter and Lily as his friends, and Remus as his entire life.

“Scum, no son of mine!”

Walburga’s voice seemed to boom louder, closer to home, as if it was only the two of them. It reminded him of being home and dropping a plate, or running up the stairs and hearing her screech at him and raising her wand-

He hadn’t realised until she opened her mouth again that she’d done just as his memories had, and he was looking down her wand and to the disgusted scowl on her face. “You deserve this, you whore. Cru-“

He was tugged back, and a crack heard through the room as Remus jumped in front of Sirius, his arms out as if to protect Sirius. Walburga whirled and a moon covered in clouds appeared instead, but the moon was a balloon and flying around the room with a flick of his wand and the counter-curse bold from Remus’s lips.

Sirius was shaking, his hands covering his head as if she was actually able to use the curse on him like she had what felt like a million times before. Remus turned around and put his wand away, gently taking hold of Sirius. “Sirius, love-“

He wretched away from him and fell back slightly, lips shaking as he tasted warm tears on his face. His combat boots sounded loudly as he ran out of the classroom, wand slipped back into his pocket as he covered his mouth, wrecked sobs chasing it. He ran into the dorm room, not hearing the portrait open as the dorm door slammed shut, and he let his stomach convulse painfully as he sobbed loudly. He could almost feel it again, the way it felt like his joints froze when he fell to the ground because of the curse, lightning zipping through his blood.

He didn’t hear the door open, but he choked on his sobs when someone kneeled behind him and pulled him into a hug, whispering to him, but Sirius couldn’t hear. He hadn’t told his friends and now they probably hated him, just like Walburga did. They wouldn’t want to look him in the eyes-

“Siri, please look at me,” Remus mumbled quietly, squeezing around Sirius’s shoulders tighter and maybe even a little painful, Moony coming through and feeling in pain like his mate was. “Please,” he pleaded quietly to him, still listening to the pained sobs. Sirius was shaking, but he obeyed and let Remus cradle his crying face in his collar bones, the ground keeping them cold and uncomfortable as Remus silently held Sirius.

It felt like hours until Sirius was quiet, breathing on Remus without a word from his lips. He pulled away slowly and looked at Remus with a guilty expression on his face, red and blotchy eyes and swollen lips. Remus went to say something, but Sirius was quicker. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered. Remus shook his head and held his face.

“Love, no,” he protested, thumb brushing his lips. “It’s okay- here, let’s get you into bed, okay?” Sirius nodded silently, allowing himself to be picked up by Remus (one of the only things that’d come out of his lycanthropy is the werewolf strength outside his transformations) and carried to his boyfriend’s bed. He remained motionless as his tie was pulled away, and slowly, was left in only his boxers, which was how he preferred to sleep. He watched as Remus stripped down, slipping on a shirt over his boxers and climbing in with Sirius. Neither cared that it was the middle of the day, the period after lunch; neither were going back to classes for that day.

“Can I hold you?” Remus asked, and Sirius only moved closer, finally relaxing when Remus held him close to his body. Their legs intertwined loosely and their hair mixed, Sirius’ long and wild and messy. Remus kissed his cheek, “We’re going to talk later, okay? But for now, sleep.”

Sirius nodded, kissing the juncture of the other’s neck. “I love you Moony.”

“I love you too, Padfoot.”


End file.
